Oh, Dear…Dear Abby

My friend and mentor, Abigail Van Buren, known to the world as “Dear Abby” and known to her parents as Pauline and known to me as the queen of good manners, is gone. Yours truly is, in a word, devastated. I am taking comfort in imported chocolates, a decent sherry, and a marathon of subtitled foreign films. “Dear Abby” had a heart of gold and a whip-like wit. She will be missed. Below is one of my favorites from a true lady who knew that grace and goodwill should always hold hands.

Dear Abby: Two men who claim to be father and adopted son just bought an old mansion across the street and fixed it up. We notice a very suspicious  mixture of company coming and going at all hours — blacks, whites,  Orientals, women who look like men and men who look like women. … This has always been considered one of the finest sections of San Francisco, and these weirdos are giving it a bad name. How can we improve the  neighborhood? — Nob Hill Residents

Dear Residents: You could move.

Yours Truly,

Dude Looks Like A Lady

Parker Presley

Dude Looks Like A Lady

Parker Presley is known in certain social circles as the preeminent expert in etiquette and invites you to contact him with even the most embarrassing question or tricky situation so that you, too, may be top dog in any setting. Please contact him at parkerpresley@epicureanCG.com.


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